Quotable: “Sorry about the last minute change Nick. I was waiting for the Steelers to permanently bench Steeler QB Stewart before I beat your ass. NIBS BEAT NICK, NIBS BEAT NICK, NIBS BEAT NICK … did I mention Nibs beat Nick.”
– Raptors owner Chris Lieberman

Player of the Week — Priest Holmes: 31 points
Player of the Week Besides Priest Holmes: Rich Gannon: 29 points
Nibsism of the Week — Nibs calls Nick’s cell phone before kickoff, changes his QB from Kordell to Griese (the boner subsided, apparently), and tells Nick to pass along the change to Ying. Nick doesn’t get cell message until Monday morning. Everyone thinks Nick won when Nibs actually beat him. Don’t know if this counts as a true Nibsism, but Nibs beating Nick is certainly newsworthy.
Clash of the Titans — Dan and Zilb both dissed the esteemed FFF editor for not playing up their titanic tilt of undefeated teams before this weekend’s games. Boohoo. Dan won, by the way. Newport Beach is the only undefeated team in the league. Newsflash: hell freezes over, film at 11.
Are They Magic? — No, they’re still the Armadillos. New rule proposal … if you lead the league in points, you must have a team name that at the very least reflects your current state of residence. Dallas/Orlando leads the league in points. Newsflash: pigs fly, film at 11.
Hot Transaction of the Week — If there is anyone that does NOT want to add Patrick Ramsey, please speak now. Anyone? Bueller?
Put Me In, Coach — Notable “bench” scores of Week 5:
BOS – Terry Glenn (11)
DAL – Brandon Stokely (14)
GBM – Jim Miller (20)
NPB – Kerry Collins (13)

Player of the Week — Shaun Alexander: 46 points
Nibsism of the Week I — After going two whole weeks without submitting a lineup that consisted of either 1) a retired player; or 2) a bye-week player, Nibs had WR Terrell Owens (bye week) in his starting lineup.
Almost Nibsism of the Week II — NPB submitted a lineup with Garrison Hearst (bye week) but Dan e-mailed at the very last minute with a correction.
Kinda Nibsism of the Week III — NPB did, however, start Patriots WR Troy Brown, who was ruled out of the game earlier in the week due to injury.
No Support — The Big Bang suffered a 53-52 loss, despite RB Shaun Alexander’s whopping 46-point effort. Let’s do the math — the rest of BOB’s team scored a total of 6 points.
WTF? — The Rams are 0-4, the Chargers are 4-0, and the Dallas Armadillos are second in the league in overall points (both points for and points against — which accounts for the 1-3 record). And while we’re at it, why are they still called the “Dallas Armadillos” when the team’s been in Florida for 3 years?
WTF? II – Week 5 game of the week: undefeated FFL (4-0) vs. undefeated NPB (4-0).
Put Me In, Coach — Notable “bench” scores of Week 4:
BOB – Marcel Shipp (17)
MVO – Stacey Mack (20)
GBM – Corey Bradford (17)
RMD – Brian Griese (15) [does Nibs just have a
boner for Kordell Stewart, or what’s the deal?]
SYR – Jamel White (14)

Player of the Week — Priest Holmes: 35 points
I Wish It Was 2000 Again — Syracuse and Boston, 2000’s Fantasy Bowl teams, both open season 0-3
Surprise of the Week I — Nibs has gone two whole weeks without submitting a lineup that consisted of either 1) a retired player; or 2) a bye-week player
Surprise of the Week II — Those golden California boys (NPB and MVO) are both 3-0.
Now That’s Consistent — Newport Beach has scored exactly 45 points in each of their first 3 games. All wins.
Whozat He Drafted? — The name Lamar Gordon (4 carries, 44 yards, TD) brought a collective What The Fuck? during the draft. Not that Ying would wish a serious neck injury or anything on Marshall Faulk… I’m just sayin’
Put Me In, Coach — Notable “bench” scores of Week 3:
MIA – Todd Pinkston (12)
FFL – Brian Finneran (14)
NDV – Clinton Portis (14)
NPB – Tom Brady (29) [3rd week in a row here]
DAL – Donald Driver (11)

Player of the Week — Drew Bledsoe: 29 points
Surprise of the Week I — Dallas: 93
Surprise of the Week II — Dallas leads league: 149 pts.
Surprise of the Week III — Dallas still hasn’t picked an appropriate team name considering the team’s been in fucking Florida for 3 years!!!
Surprise of the Week IV — Plaxico Burress, Jerome Bettis and Curtis Martin: all have 0 points through first 2 weeks
Put Me In, Coach — Notable “bench” scores of Week 2:
MER – Moe Williams (14)
FFL – Quincy Carter (10)
NPB – Tom Brady (12); Josh Reed (14)

Player of the Week — Priest Holmes: 32 points
Nibsism of the Week I — Nibs: starting Jeff Graham (not on an NFL roster)
Nibsism of the Week II — Nibs: starting “Stewart – RB” (not on Nibs’ roster)
Asleep at the Wheel — Boston: 31 points for starters, 47 points on bench
Surprise of the Week I — Travis Henry: 29 points
Surprise of the Week II — Olandis Gary, Clinton Portis, Mike Anderson: 0 points
Put Me In, Coach — Notable “bench” scores of the week:
BOS – Quincy Morgan (23)
FFL – Michael Vick (14)
GBM – Warrick Dunn (14)
NPB – Tom Brady (17); Charlie Garner (25)

[bold bracketed] = overall draft number

Round One:

1. [1] New Denver – Clinton Portis, RB, Broncos
2. [2] Richmond – Deuce McAllister, RB, Saints
3. [3] Mercer – Michael Pittman, RB, Bucs
4. [4] Dallas – Eric Moulds, WR, Bills
5. [5] Mission Viejo – TJ Duckett, RB, Falcons
6. [6] Frehlinghuysen – William Green, RB, Browns
7. [7] Newport Beach – Garrison Hearst, RB, 49ers
8. [8] Miami – James Stewart, RB, Lions
9. [9] Boston (via Syracuse) – Jonathan Wells, RB, Texans
10. [10] New York – DeShaun Foster, RB, Panthers
11. [11] Oregon – Darrell Jackson, WR, Seahawks
12. [12] Graynbald – Warrick Dunn, RB, Falcons
13. [13] Keystone – Amani Toomer, WR, Giants
14. [14] Boston – Keenan McCardell, WR, Bucs

Round Two:

1. [15] New York (via NDV) – Travis Taylor, WR, Ravens
2. [16] Dallas – Drew Bledsoe, QB, Bills
3. [17] Frehlinghuysen – Lamar Smith, RB, Panthers
4. [18] Richmond – Mike Anderson, RB, Broncos
5. [19] Mission Viejo – Derrick Alexander, WR, Vikings
6. [20] Newport Beach – Terrence Wilkins, WR, Rams
7. [21] Mercer – Peerless Price, WR, Bills
8. [22] Miami – Antwaan Randle-El, WR, Steelers
9. [23] Syracuse – Qadry Ismail, WR, Colts
10. [24] New York – Johnnie Morton, WR, Chiefs
11. [25] Oregon – Troy Hambrick, RB, Cowboys
12. [26] Graynbald – Koren Robinson, WR, Seahawks
13. [27] Keystone – Trung Canidate, RB, Rams
14. [28] Boston – Hines Ward, WR, Steelers

Round Three:

1. [29] New Denver – Bill Schroeder, WR, Lions
2. [30] Oregon (via Dallas) – Peter Warrick, WR, Bengals
3. [31] New York (via FFL) – Chester Taylor, RB, Ravens
4. [32] Richmond – James Allen, RB, Texans
5. [33] Mission Viejo – Stacey Mack, RB, Jaguars
6. [34] Newport Beach – Frank Sanders, WR, Cardinals
7. [35] Mercer – Donte Stallworth, WR, Saints
8. [36] Miami – Jeremy Shockey, TE, Giants
9. [37] Syracuse – Jacquez Green, WR, Redskins
10. [38] Frehlinghuysen (via New York) – Az-Zahir Hakim, WR, Lions
11. [39] Boston (via FFL; via BOB) – JJ Stokes, WR, 49ers
12. [40] New York (via Graynbald) – Trent Green, QB, Chiefs
13. [41] New Denver (via Keystone) – Ron Dayne, RB, Giants
14. [42] Boston – Antonio Bryant, WR, Cowboys

Supplemental

1. [43] Miami – Brian Westbrook, RB, Eagles
2. [44] Oregon – Jake Plummer, QB, Cardinals

Round Four:

1. [45] New Denver – Tim Dwight, WR, Chargers
2. [46] Dallas – Ike Hilliard, WR, Giants
3. [47] Frehlinghuysen – Robert Ferguson, WR, Packers
4. [48] Richmond – Jeff Wilkins, K, Rams
5. [49] Mission Viejo – Marcus Robinson, WR, Bears
6. [50] Newport Beach – Jason Elam, K, Broncos
7. [51] Mercer – Lamont Jordon, RB, Jets
8. [52] Miami – Santana Moss, WR, Jets
9. [53] Syracuse – Jamel White, RB, Browns
10. [54] New York – David Akers, K, Eagles
11. [55] Oregon – Amos Zereoue, RB, Steelers
12. [56] Graynbald – Tyrone Wheatley, RB, Raiders
13. [57] Keystone – Olindo Mare, K, Dolphins
14. [58] Boston – Lamar Gordon, RB, Rams

Round Five:

1. [59] New Denver – Javon Walker, WR, Packers
2. [60] Dallas – Adam Vinatieri, K, Patriots
3. [61] Frehlinghuysen – Brian Finneran, WR, Falcons
4. [62] Richmond – Todd Peterson, K, Steelers
5. [63] Mission Viejo – John Carney, K, Saints
6. [64] Boston (via Newport Beach) – Brad Johnson, QB, Bucs
7. [65] Mercer – Tony Richardson, RB, Chiefs
8. [66] Miami – Vinny Testaverde, QB, Jets
9. [67] Syracuse – Bubba Franks, TE, Packers
10. [68] Graynbald (via New York) – D’Wayne Bates, WR, Vikings
11. [69] Oregon – Tim Couch, QB, Browns
12. [70] Graynbald – Doug Brien, K, Vikings
13. [71] Keystone – Trent Dilfer, QB, Seahawks
14. [72] Frehlinghuysen (via Boston) – Reggie Wayne, WR, Colts

Round Six:

1. [73] New York (via New Denver) – Ladell Betts, RB, Redskins
2. [74] Boston (via Dallas) – Quincy Morgan, WR, Browns
3. [75] Frehlinghuysen – Kevin McDougal, RB, Colts
4. [76] Richmond – Jeff Graham, WR
5. [77] Mission Viejo – Willie Jackson, WR, Falcons
6. [78] Newport Beach – Kerry Collins, QB, Giants
7. [79] Mercer – Marcus Pollard, TE, Colts
8. [80] Miami – Todd Pinkston, WR, Eagles
9. [81] Syracuse – David Carr, QB, Texans
10. [82] New York (via FFL; via NYG) – Skip Hicks, RB, Titans
11. [83] Oregon – Jabar Gaffney, WR, Texans
12. [84] Graynbald – Dez White, WR, Bears
13. [85] New Denver (via Keystone) – Jerome Pathon, WR, Saints
14. [86] Boston – Jay Feely, K, Falcons

Round Seven:

1. [87] New Denver – Leon Johnson, RB, Bears
2. [88] Dallas – Michael Westbrook, WR, Bengals
3. [89] Frehlinghuysen – Quincy Carter, QB, Cowboys
4. [90] Richmond – Ashley Lelie, WR, Broncos
5. [91] Mission Viejo – Shawn Bryson, RB, Bills
6. [92] Newport Beach – JR Redmond, RB, Patriots
7. [93] Mercer – David Patten, WR, Patriots
8. [94] Miami – Sebastian Janikowski, K, Raiders
9. [95] Syracuse – Deion Branch, WR, Patriots
10. [96] New Denver (via New York) – Joey Harrington, QB, Lions
11. [97] Oregon – Maurice Morris, RB, Seahawks
12. [98] New Denver (via Graynbald) – Bobby Shaw, WR, Jaguars
13. [99] Keystone – Darnay Scott, WR, Jaguars
14. [100] Boston – James Jackson, RB, Browns

Supplemental

1. none

Round Eight:

1. [101] Keystone (via New Denver) – Jerry Porter, WR, Raiders
2. [102] Dallas – Larry Centers, RB, Bills
3. [103] Frehlinghuysen – Rondell Mealey, RB, Packers
4. [104] Richmond – Joe Jurevicius, WR, Bucs
5. [105] Mission Viejo – Travis Stephens, RB, Bucs
6. [106] Newport Beach – Marvin Minnis, WR, Chiefs
7. [107] Mercer – Moe Williams, RB, Vikings
8. [108] Miami – Oronde Gadsden, WR, Dolphins
9. [109] Syracuse – Chris Fuamatu-Ma’afala, RB, Steelers
10. [110] New York (via FFL; via NYG) – Ricky Watters, RB
11. [111] Oregon – Marcel Shipp, RB, Cardinals
12. [112] Graynbald – Jim Miller, QB, Bears
13. [113] Keystone – Freddie Mitchell, WR, Eagles
14. [EXTRA] Boston

Round Nine:

1. [EXTRA] New Denver
2. [114] Dallas – Donald Driver, WR, Packers
3. [EXTRA] Frehlinghuysen
4. [115] Richmond – Charlie Batch, QB, Steelers
5. [116] Mission Viejo – David Terrell, WR, Bears
6. [117] Newport Beach – Josh Reed, WR, Bills
7. [118] Mercer – Germaine Crowell, WR, Lions
8. [119] Miami – Randy McMichael, TE, Dolphins
9. [120] Syracuse – Brett Conway, K, Redskins
10. [121] New York – Brandon Bennett, RB, Bengals
11. [122] Oregon – Phil Dawson, K, Browns
12. [123] Graynbald – Corey Bradford, WR, Texans
13. [124] Keystone – Shawn Jefferson, WR, Falcons
14. [EXTRA] Boston

Round Ten:

1. [EXTRA] New Denver
2. [125] Dallas – Brandon Stokely, WR, Ravens
3. [EXTRA] Frehlinghuysen
4. [EXTRA] Richmond
5. [EXTRA] Mission Viejo
6. [126] Newport Beach – Troy Edwards, WR, Rams
7. [EXTRA] Mercer
8. [127] Miami – Ricky Proehl, WR, Rams
9. [128] Syracuse – Josh Scobey, RB, Cardinals
10. [EXTRA] New York
11. [129] Oregon – Byron Chamberlain, TE, Vikings
12. [130] Graynbald – Tai Streets, WR, 49ers
13. [131] Keystone – Doug Chapman, RB, Vikings
14. [EXTRA] Boston

Additional

1. [132] Dallas – Brad Hoover, RB, Panthers
2. [133] Syracuse – Shyrone Stith, RB, Colts
3. [134] Graynbald – Jamal Anderson, RB
4. [135] Keystone – Danny Wuerffel, QB, Redskins*

*illegal pick … exceeds QB rules

(based on the formula in the league rules, teams will play in the following divisions next season)

Paterno: BOS, BOB, MIA, MVO, FFL

Cappelletti: KEY, NYG, MER, RMD, DAL

Engle: GBM, SYR, NPB, NDV

(regular draft order; teams with asterisk will be in the lottery for the first round)

1. New Denver*
2. Dallas*
3. Frehlinghuysen*
4. Richmond*
5. Mission Viejo*
6. Newport Beach*
7. Mercer*
8. Miami
9. Syracuse
10. New York
11. Oregon
12. Graynbald
13. Keystone
14. Boston