by CBS Fantasy Journalist

Dallas Armadillos easily bested New Chester Thorobreds this week, while Mercer Mustangs emerged victorious in a much tighter contest against Philadelphia Griffins. Meanwhile, Coach Pat landy lost despite doing all he could on the coaching front. Read all about it in this week’s report.

Game of Inches

Both Mercer Mustangs and Philadelphia Griffins entered this game ice cold. Mercer Mustangs had scored the second fewest points of any team over the last three weeks, while Philadelphia Griffins had scored the fewest points of any team over the last three weeks. Mercer Mustangs shrugged off their troubles this week though.

Mercer Mustangs just edged by Philadelphia Griffins, winning 58.5 to 55.5. Mercer Mustangs got their first back-to-back wins of the season, bringing their record to 3 – 6. The loss drops Philadelphia Griffins to 3 – 6, and sinks them to the bottom of our internal power rankings.

Davante Adams separated himself from the rest of the crew on Mercer Mustangs, scoring 19.5 points. Good performances are nothing new for Adams, who has been the top performer on Mercer Mustangs more times than any other player. He caught nine targets for 126 yards on Sunday and dodged the Colts defense for this 48 yard rushing touchdown.

Meanwhile, Philadelphia Griffins didn’t have anybody who was too hot, or too cold, but this Goldilocks outcome was not ‘just right’. Josh Jacobs topped the running back average by 4.9 points to lead the team, while A.J. Dillon fell only 5.1 points short of the average RB in bringing up the rear. Coach Nicholas Fisher has to be used to bad scores from Dillon, who has been the worst performer on Philadelphia Griffins more times than any other player. He has now underperformed the league average running back in seven straight games.

Coach Fisher’s lineup moves played a huge part in Philadelphia Griffins’ loss. He started three players that the experts thought should be riding the pine. One of those picks, Rachaad White, worked out. The other picks, Taysom Hill and Dillon, did not.

While these moves were somewhat defensible, they cost Philadelphia Griffins a total of 6.5 points, which ended up costing them the game. Coach Fisher might want to draw a lesson from what happened, as his team has a much better record when he follows the experts’ opinions on who to start.

End of the Line

Boxboro Blowfish made sure that they didn’t become the 8th straight team to lose to Miami Muffdivers. Boxboro Blowfish made it look easy against Miami Muffdivers, winning 78 to 54.

Boxboro Blowfish have now finished off three straight opponents after this win, giving them a record of 6 – 2 – 1. The loss drops Miami Muffdivers’ record to 8 – 2.

Boxboro Blowfish won with a balanced effort, as four players outperformed their positional averages. Saquon Barkley was the first among equals, tallying 19.5 points. SaQuads has now gone seven weeks without dipping below the average running back’s points. He scored a touchdown and racked up 152 rushing yards on Sunday, and with plays like this it’s easy to see how.

Meanwhile, Miami Muffdivers were having trouble reaching paydirt, getting into the end zone only one time. Miami Muffdivers were practicing their manners as they put every other team ahead of themselves in the TotTDScored category this week.

Coach Landy’s gameday decisions have been some of the best in the league this season, and this week showed why. He followed the experts’ advice for each position and ended up with a perfect lineup. He has now set the most perfect lineups of anyone in the league.

Cruising

After knocking New Chester Thorobreds out of the playoffs last year, you might expect Dallas Armadillos to give ’em a break this week. Well, they didn’t. Dallas Armadillos crushed New Chester Thorobreds, winning 95.5 to 63.5. The 95.5 points Dallas Armadillos scored set the high mark for the league this week.

The win brings Dallas Armadillos to 5 – 4, and sends them to the top of our internal power rankings. The loss was New Chester Thorobreds’ 3rd in their last four games, bringing their record to 6 – 3.

Two of the key players in this fight were real-life teammates, as Dallas Armadillos’ Patrick Mahomes squared off against JuJu Smith-Schuster. While they were on the same team, they sure didn’t deliver the same result. For Patrick Mahomes’ part, he totaled 26 points for Dallas Armadillos. Mahomes threw for 331 yards and four touchdowns on Sunday, which is hardly surprising since he’s thrown four TDs in 22.2 percent of the games he’s played (an NFL record).

On the other hand, JuJu Smith-Schuster was not living up to his star status, producing only 1 point. That’s the fewest points that he’s scored so far this year.

The other players on Dallas Armadillos kept up with Mahomes, coming up with 69.5 points. That group was led by CeeDee Lamb, who scored 29.5 points. That performance was the best of any player this week.(1)

Out of the Darkness

Orange Co. Beach Dudes (2 – 8) came into this week with the worst record in the league, and finished this week with the worst record in the league. They couldn’t seal the deal against Happy Valley Violence (4 – 6), losing 82.5 to 78.5. Tough luck loss for Orange Co. Beach Dudes, who would have won against eight other teams this week.

The game gave sweet relief to one team, even though both teams needed it. Orange Co. Beach Dudes came into the game on a six game losing streak The victory ended Happy Valley Violence’s five game losing streak.

Happy Valley Violence got a nice group performance in the win, as four players beat their positional averages. Travis Kelce was just a bit ahead of the others, putting up 14 points.(2) That’s all in a day’s work for the best player in the league. He earned 81 yards on Sunday and scored this easy touchdown after being left undefended for only a moment.

Orange Co. Beach Dudes had never won when Ryan Succop failed to hit his expected points, and that held true again this week. Succop was one of three big underperformers, combining with Deebo Samuel and Allen Lazard to record 6.5 points.

The loss this week certainly wasn’t Coaches dan callahan and Ross Hessler’s fault. They went with Donovan Peoples-Jones over the higher ranked Gerald Everett.

This decision gave Orange Co. Beach Dudes a nice 7.5 point bonus. Coaches dan callahan and Ross Hessler’s decisions this week allow them to relinquish their title as the worst gameday coach in the league (Coach David Zilberfarb wears the crown now).

On a Tear

Frelinghuysen Froglickers have been relying on Justin Jefferson all year, and he came through again this week. Frelinghuysen Froglickers gave Big Oregon Bang a 73.5 to 41 drubbing behind 27 points from Jefferson. A good performance by Jefferson has been crucial for Frelinghuysen Froglickers all year, as they have gone 3 – 1 when he exceeds expectations, and 1 – 3 when he doesn’t. In a game full of incredible plays, his leaping one-handed snag might just be the best of them all.

The only real bad apple in Frelinghuysen Froglickers’ orchard this week was Cordarrelle Patterson, who scored 0.5 points. The five carries, 18 rushing yards and two receiving yards Patterson earned on Thursday were all season lows for the veteran running back.

Coach Wayne rupert will find no easy scapegoat for this week’s loss. Big Oregon Bang were brought down by six underperformers, the worst of whom was David Montgomery (2.5 points).(3) Montgomery has now failed to top the league average running back in five straight games. Perhaps not coincidentally, he has also been the worst player on Big Oregon Bang more than anybody else on the team.

Big Oregon Bang also had to deal with a poor effort from Travis Etienne (6.1 points below expected). Etienne’s performance this week broke his five game streak of surpassing his projections. Big Oregon Bang only had one player who gave a passable performance this week, with Nick Chubb scoring 10.5 points.(2)

The win brings Frelinghuysen Froglickers’ winning streak to four games, and gives them a record of 5 – 4. The loss drops Big Oregon Bang’s record to an identical 5 – 4.

Having a Fields Day

Justin Fields was the clear leader on Chicago Mud this week, racking up 33 points. Fields hasn’t been messing around recently, performing better than any other starter over the last three weeks. This amazing touchdown was just one of the four he scored on Sunday, becoming the first QB in history to rush for 140+ yards in back-to-back games in the process.

Meanwhile, it will be difficult for Coach Terry Muth to fault any one player for the loss. Keystone Longfellows had five underperformers, with Jerry Jeudy (zero points) being the worst. Jeudy’s 0 point performance was worse than every other wide receiver this week. He failed to record a single catch before leaving Sunday’s game early with an ankle injury.

Keystone Longfellows might have been feeling cocky after coming up with 90.5 points last week. They’re probably feeling a bit humbler now. Chicago Mud destroyed Keystone Longfellows, winning 85.5 to 53.5. The win brings Chicago Mud’s record to 3 – 6, while dropping Keystone Longfellows to 6 – 3 – 1.

Chicago Mud wasn’t just winning on the field this week, but also chalked up a win in the front office. Coach Ronnie Feldman picked up Christian Watson off the waiver wire and saw him score 27 points (on the bench, but still).

(1)Player didn’t score the most points this week, but did the best versus their positional average
(2)Player didn’t have most points on team, but did the best compared to their position
(3)Player didn’t have fewest points on team, but did the worst versus their positional average